woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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