Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.

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(909): View more from California

I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.

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(540): View more from Virginia

did you hook up at the wedding?

(1-540): View more from Virginia

No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(616): View more from Michigan

They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar

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(808): View more from Hawaii

she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous

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(554): View more from

No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted

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(925): View more from California

Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won

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(097): View more from

"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.

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