the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
