So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
