He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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