I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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