This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize