I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
