I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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