U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
