before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
