Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I would ride that face into the sunset
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
