She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
