Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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