dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
