you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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