im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize