Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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