Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
