once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
