I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Hippo gnu deer
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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