you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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