i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
