Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
