dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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