Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize