Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
