I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
