I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
