playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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