i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
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...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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