That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
