This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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