I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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