If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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