he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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