You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
