Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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