Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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