he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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