so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize
