I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
