You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize