I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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