Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Who died my cat blue again?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
