ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
