You're a womanizer and a bitch.
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
