You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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