THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
