this will be a night to untag.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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