i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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